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April 27th, 2009

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October 9th, 2007

08:07 am - Overselling leads to mockery. It's the law. I've come to peace with many things that annoyed me about the cheese business at first. I've been doing it long enough that the pretentious minority is more amusing than annoying. I'm old enough that I don't get dismissed by customers looking for the real buyer and who didn't want to talk to a young kid who "didn't know anything". Graying hair does that I guess. But this is truly mock-worthy. Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present the American Cheesemaker Awards (registered trademark). You might ask how an event that has never existed before is "the premier culinary event in Orange County and one of the most prestigious in the U.S.". That is a very good question. I don't have an answer for you. I've fielded a few calls over the last month or so with cheesemakers asking what I know about this event. Now, most of them are not West Coast folks and don't realize that Orange County is hundreds of miles away from San Francisco. It's not like cheesemakers call me to consult on what shows and contests they should participate in, it's just that for such a "prestigious" event there is no one anyone in the cheese business has ever heard of involved, (at least not publicly) and they're hoping I can shed some light. What's weird about this event? Besides the fact that it is somehow one of the "most prestigious" events in the US and has never actually occurred, there's the issue of timing. This event is scheduled for the weekend before Thanksgiving. If you don't work in the food business you have every right not to know this, but the Wednesday* before Thanksgiving is the busiest retail food day of the year, and that week is generally the biggest week. It's like the day after Thanksgiving is for the department store and electronics folks. Despite the conferences promises of cheesemaker access to "the trade", the trade will be busy selling cheese right about then. Other red flags appear on their website. "The nation's fascination with all things epicurean, artisan and organic has brought fresh attention to the artisan cheesemaking community". Now, I know this is just someone hired to write ad copy, but the amount of non-commodity-style organic cheese is next to none. Besides Cowgirl Creamery, Elk Creamery, and the Vermont Tarentaise there is very little that even tries to be fancy-schmancy. You have to start wondering when a food event's promo material misunderstands the word "organic". The other part is the incredible vagueness enveloping the website like a commuter-killing tule fog. Check this out: "Cheesemakers, winemakers, cheese experts, authors and specialty food purveyors from across the country are gathering along with gourmet food enthusiasts from the public to taste and rate America's top artisan cheeses. The event will feature sessions taught by cheese experts, tastings of cheese-inspired recipes and pairings from top chefs, and an awards dinner." This event is about a month away and there are no professional names associated with it. Even the "Cheese Academy" segment has no "teachers" associated with it.** Sheesh, the annual Sonoma Cheese Conference,*** a real industry event, has their speakers list out about a year ahead of time. So, what is this thing? I really don't know. Clearly it's mostly chef-oriented which is fine, except that most chefs know next to nothing about cheese.**** But that's cool, they need to learn somewhere and it certainly isn't happening in culinary school. I think it may just be someone's idea for how to bring a bunch of folks to a hotel in SoCal on what may be usually a slow week. I wouldn't (and didn't) tell anyone to not attend, I just think it's funny that after all these years of working in the cheese mines, people are copying our trade events, subtracting the members of the trade who usually organize them, and marketing them to well-off foodies and chefs as a "premier" event. And again, it's not the actual event that bothers me. The more the better for small cheesemakers. It's the way it's being oversold. If I was a cheesemaker, I'd send a wheel or two. Who knows? If you win, it's something to put on your website. That can't hurt. Just don't rush out and make stickers that you expect retailers to use, ok? Geez, they're in SoCal. Watch them get their awards televised on the Food Channel. (Oh man, check out the Sponsorship Opportunities pdf. I almost missed that. Nice graphics. And full of great fun facts. Quick, answer in the comments! How much more likely to buy brie are consumers with family income over $250,000 than those with incomes lower than $250,000?) *This is as good a time as any to say that the Wednesday before Thanksgiving will be the second annual drinking-beer-outside-at-Zeitgeist-whatever-the-weather night. 10:30 PM. Bring an umbrella, I (and hopefully anarqueso and ilipodscrill) will bring trash bags to sit on. It is the premier drinking event in San Francisco County and one of the most prestigious in the U.S. **I have no doubt they can get some good folks btw. Retailers and distributors may be busy but cheese company reps and food writers are not subject to the consumer rush at the same time. Reps who try to visit that time of year are chased from the store. ***Full disclosure: I have been a part of the Sonoma event almost every year but am not an organizer of it nor do I receive payment for it beyond what's considered work for our store. But it's not like this event is competition. ****hey, that isn't me being a jerk. I certainly know less about being a chef. Current Music: Chumbawamba - "Ulrike" Tags: cheese, mockery

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